Disclosures - SF4 Read online

  "Damn good idea, Rock," Wendy said, as she grabbed the woman next to her and collapsed. In a matter of moments, everyone except the two newcomers was out cold. Ryan stuck her hand in the cooler and pulled the last beer from the ice, handing it to Jamie to open.

  "I like your friends," Jamie smirked. "Sparkling conversationalists."

  Ryan looked out at the group with a fond smile. "They’re nice women," she said. "Most of them work at my old gym."

  "I’m sure they are nice," Jamie quickly agreed, hoping that her comment had not been offensive. "I’m sure they’re a little more interactive when they’re not hammered." Just then, the woman next to Jamie started to snore loudly, and the green eyes met Ryan’s as she suggested, "How about a change in scenery?"

  "Not a bad idea," Ryan grinned. They moved about 25 feet away, close enough to watch over the sleeping women, but far enough away to escape their sound effects. "Hey, Babe?" Jamie asked when they were settled. "How many more nicknames do you have?"

  "Huh? Ohhh…I forgot that Wendy used that one." Ryan smiled in remembrance. "Some of the people at the gym called me that."

  "Because…?"

  Ryan blushed just a bit as she was forced to admit, "I uh…won the trainer’s challenge a couple of years, and uh…some of the people thought I was um…rock hard." She gulped a little in embarrassment, the rare emotion completely charming to Jamie.

  She trailed the tips of her fingers down the exposed flesh of Ryan’s muscular arms, lingering for a moment at the blue vein that bulged across her bicep. Leaning in close to Ryan’s ear she whispered, "You are, you know. You’re rock hard and baby soft, all in one big, luscious package."

  Ryan’s arm draped across her partner’s shoulders, the scent of baby powder wafting up to make both of them giggle. "See?" Jamie teased. "You’re my big, rock hard baby."

  "I’ll always be your baby," Ryan promised, tilting her head to nibble on the lips that called to her.

  They sat in companionable silence, sipping the beer and gazing out at the assembled throng. The huge stage was slowly filling with musicians, and before long some thrumming rock started blaring from the massive speakers. Even though the music was loud, they could speak in normal tones since they were so far away from the stage.

  The sun was warm on this clear June afternoon, and after just a few minutes Jamie felt the day catch up with her. "I think I’m gonna go crawl onto that empty space with your friends," she said as a yawn escaped.

  "Could I interest you in a little cuddling right here?" Clear blue eyes blinked over at Jamie, who smiled as she considered a lifetime of saying "yes" to whatever question this wonderful woman asked.

  "Let’s do it," she agreed. Ryan spread her leather jacket onto the ground and lay down on half of it, extending an arm as she waited for Jamie to cuddle in. They wriggled around for a while but managed to get comfortable, and nodded off a short time later.

  "Mmmm," Jamie murmured as she tried to swat the annoying insect that had been bedeviling her for long minutes. No matter how quickly she slapped at the silent bug, it managed to evade her until she was fit to be tied. "Damn it!" She sat up and turned her head to find twinkling blue eyes gazing up at her, a long stalk of grass between her teeth.

  "Something wrong, Babe?" The grass fluttered in the even, white teeth as Ryan spoke.

  Grabbing the stalk from her partner’s mouth, Jamie attempted to shove the annoying stem into her skin-tight top. The work was slow, but rewarding, and both women were collapsed in a tumble of limbs when a passerby stopped abruptly and said, "Jamie? Jamie Evans?"

  All movement stopped as Jamie’s head peeked out from around Ryan’s armpit. "Melissa Johnston?" she squeaked out in astonishment, catching site of Mia’s erstwhile lover from prep school. Ryan lifted her arm and helped her partner sit up and compose herself as much as possible. Scrambling to her feet, Jamie continued to stammer. "W…w…what are you doing here?"

  Melissa glanced at the "Happily Married" stickers that covered both women’s breasts, the deep blush that covered Jamie’s face, and the G.I. Jane outfit and lifted one eyebrow. "Same thing you are, it appears," she said with a smile.

  "Hi, Melissa," Ryan said quietly, nearly causing Jamie to faint dead away.

  "Ryan? Jesus, I didn’t even stop to look!"

  To Jamie’s eternal gratitude, Melissa merely extended a hand for Ryan to shake. Thank God I don’t have to witness them kissing! she grumbled as she fleetingly rued the day she hooked up with an "experienced" woman.

  Melissa was smiling so brightly that she looked like she would burst. "Of all the people to run into! My God! Jamie Evans…and with Ryan O’Flaherty, no less! This is just too, too much!"

  "Yeah, it is too much," Jamie agreed, trying to maintain her composure, but feeling sick to her stomach.

  "When was the last time we saw each other, Jamie? Wasn’t it our coming out party?"

  "Yeah…" Jamie had to chortle at the irony of the question. "I guess it was. So here we are again…three years later. I guess we’re destined to come out again and again and again."

  Both Ryan and Melissa laughed at the helpless look on the obviously-flustered woman. "So how long have you two been together?" Melissa asked. "I’ve never heard word one about you being gay, Jamie."

  "Great," she said with no enthusiasm. "I guess that won’t last long, huh?"

  "Oooh, not out to the family?" Melissa asked with a surprising amount of concern in her voice.

  "We’ve just um…made it official," Ryan broke in. "Jamie’s not out to hardly anyone yet." Ryan fixed Melissa with her most serious gaze and added, "She’d really like to be the one to tell her family."

  "Oh, of course!" Melissa looked taken aback at the suggestion that she might "out" Jamie. "I’m out to my parents, but I haven’t told anyone from Hillsborough. It’s just not worth the trouble!"

  "So things are good with you and your family?" Jamie asked, trying to turn the spotlight back to Melissa.

  "God no!" she laughed. "They’ve practically disowned me! If I didn’t have a full scholarship, I’d have had to drop out of school!"

  "Are you kidding me?!" Jamie was shocked at this news. She didn’t know the Johnstons very well, but Melissa’s mother was involved in a lot of charity functions on the Peninsula, and Jamie was sure their mothers were well acquainted.

  "My mother went berserk," Melissa commented dryly. "It wasn’t a very long trip, I might add."

  "God, I’m really sorry," Jamie said.

  "No big deal." Melissa acted as though the matter really did not trouble her. "My dad’s fairly cool. He slips me some money once in a while, and my grandmother is supportive. I’m doing fine, actually. Getting out of Hillsborough was the best thing I’ve ever done." She looked over her shoulder when a woman called her name. "Hey, here’s my sweetie now."

  A lanky blonde came over and joined the group, and Melissa introduced her. "This is Andi. Andi, this is Jamie Evans. We went to high school together. And this is her partner, Ryan." Jamie noted that Melissa omitted any detail on how she had come to know Ryan. Hmmm, I wonder if Andi is the jealous type?

  They exchanged pleasantries for a few minutes before Melissa asked in a casual tone, "Who are you living with now, Jamie? Still with Cassie and Mia?"

  Jamie gave her a bright smile and nodded. "Cassie won’t be back, but Mia will come home in September. She’s in L.A. this summer with her boyfriend." Jamie didn’t want Melissa to think that Mia had come over to the other side, too.

  "Cool," Melissa said with a dampening of her cheerful voice. "Tell them I said ‘hi’ next time you see them."

  "Will do, Melissa. Give me a call sometime—I’m listed." Ryan was surprised to hear the sincerity in Jamie’s voice.

  "It’s a deal," the smiling woman promised. "I’d really like to, Jamie."

  "See ya." They both waved as the visitors strolled away, hand in hand.

  "I need a list. Preferably in alphabetical order, but if you can’t manage that, I’ll take whatever yo
u can give me. I want the name or the description of every woman that you have ever slept with, copped a feel from, or French kissed. I can’t take another one of these surprise attacks, Ryan. I mean it."

  Expecting to see anger flashing in the green eyes, Ryan was surprised and saddened to see only resigned frustration. Taking a deep breath, Ryan spoke the truth. "I didn’t sleep with Melissa, Jamie. I also didn’t cop a feel, or kiss her—French or otherwise." Ryan’s voice was subdued, and when Jamie met her eyes she looked like a small child that had been punished unjustly.

  Lying down upon the leather jacket, Jamie blew out a long, frustrated breath. She knew that Ryan was telling the truth, since Ryan always told the truth, but the entire incident had left her feeling bruised and vulnerable. "I’m sorry, Ryan," she said softly. "I shouldn’t have jumped to that conclusion."

  Ryan lay down next to her and patted her cheek gently. "S’okay, Babe. Not like you wouldn’t have been right 19 times out of 20."

  Sadness laced with regret clouded the eyes that Jamie loved, and her heart clenched in shame. "That’s no excuse, Ryan. It’s unfair of me to assume that you’ve slept with every woman you know by name. Besides, even if you have, what difference does it make?" She sat up and tried to order her thoughts before speaking. Ryan was looking at her with a curious gaze, but she didn’t comment. "It just doesn’t matter, Baby," she finally decided, and as she said the words, she knew them to be true. "All that matters is that we love each other now…and that we’re faithful to each other now. The past is past."

  Ryan sat upright, her shoulder brushing against Jamie’s as she did so. "I just wish…" she began in a soft voice, but Jamie placed her fingers against her lips, effectively silencing her regret.

  "I wished for a wonderful mate, and I got one. That’s all that matters, Honey…really." Ryan still looked a little down, and Jamie made another try. "Look, Babe, when we were in Pebble Beach you told me that I shouldn’t regret having had Jack in my life. You said that loving him made me open to loving you. I think you were right about that, Baby. But you’ve got to know that the same thing holds true for you."

  Ryan shot her a quizzical gaze, still not speaking, but obviously waiting to be reassured.

  "You are the woman…and the lover… that you are because of the experiences you’ve had." Jamie’s voice had grown soft, and there was a hint of seduction in it. She lifted her hand and started to trace her finger around the outlines of Ryan’s leather vest, turning the hint into a definite overture. "I know you’re a very creative woman, but I bet you learned a lot from the women you’ve been with." Jamie’s breath was floating across Ryan’s skin like a warm breeze, and the dark woman shuddered from the sensation. "I owe those women a debt of gratitude," she whispered. "Especially the one who taught you to do this…"

  Forcing her surprised lover onto her back, Jamie illustrated one of Ryan’s favorite moves, performing a credible rendition of the fluttering tongue movement her lover had perfected through her years of experience. Ryan let out a low groan as the gentle assault continued, finding herself powerless under her partner’s relentlessly probing tongue.

  Coming up for air, Jamie panted out, "This is the longest we’ve gone without making love all week. I…I don’t know if I can control myself."

  Ryan gazed up at her and stated the obvious. "We don’t have to wait, Baby. We’re among friends."

  Her waggling eyebrow made clear just what she was suggesting, but Jamie found her head rapidly shaking. "You mean…here?!"

  The seductive grin on Ryan’s flushed face indicated that was exactly what she meant. "I’ve done worse."

  Small fingers paused at the tab of the zipper that held the objects of Jamie’s desire captive. A very large part of her wanted to yank that zipper down and let all of that creamy flesh spill out of the leather and into her waiting hands. But another part of her didn’t want to share their intimacy with anyone, much less the dozens of women on the plateau that would have ringside seats. Ryan wasn’t pushing—she had merely stated an option—but Jamie decided that she didn’t want to have public sex with her partner—today or ever.

  "I don’t want to," she said in a quiet voice. "I mean…I want to…really, really badly. But not here…not now."

  Ryan wrapped her in a gentle embrace and whispered into her ear, "I’m glad. I didn’t want to either."

  Jamie’s head shot up as she tried to focus on her too-close partner. "What? Then why did you…"

  "I was just laying out the options, Babe. I’ve done that type of thing before, and if you wanted to, I wouldn’t have objected." A gentle smile tugged at the corners of her mouth as she gazed at Jamie and softly stroked her face. "But it’s not what I want…for us. Sex can be public—but making love is private. And we make love," she declared softly, kissing Jamie with a tender passion that made her body go limp.

  Pulling away several minutes later, Ryan teased, "Hey, where did your muscles go?" She grasped a nearby hand, picked it up, and chuckled when it fell to the ground as she released it.

  "My muscles wanna have sex," the smaller woman moaned. "The message from my brain has been completely ignored by the rest of my body."

  "Poor body," Ryan crooned, running her warm hands down the sensitive flesh. She leaned over and placed gentle kisses on every part she could reach, murmuring, "Don’t worry, body, you’ll be taken care of as soon as we get home."

  "Promise?" Glittering, desire-filled eyes begged.

  "Promise," Ryan vowed, bending to kiss Jamie’s lips one last time. "I think I can satisfy your body and your mind." Her flashing blue eyes made Jamie believe every word, and she was able to relax and settle into a long, leisurely, loving hug.

  It was close to eight when the last band finished. A long string of announcements called the group to some semblance of order, and the energy started to pick up. "Let’s walk around a little bit," Ryan suggested.

  They stopped to make sure that Ryan’s friends from the gym were awake enough to look out for themselves and then made their way down the hill. "Look, Honey," Jamie enthused when they went past the large playground in the corner of the park.

  "That’ll be us in a few years," Ryan laughed as she came up behind her partner and clasped her hands around her in a loose embrace. They both smiled at the scene as they watched women play with their young children on the various pieces of equipment. Several couples had babies in strollers or packs and, as Jamie expected, Ryan was drawn to them like a bee to honey. When they got close, Ryan pointed out a pair of women playing with a young boy on the swings. "Hey, that’s Stacy and Melinda from the AIDS Ride." They dashed over and greeted the couple enthusiastically.

  "Stacy, Melinda, how are you?" Ryan cried, wrapping each woman in a warm embrace. Jamie offered an equally friendly, but slightly less demonstrative welcome, smiling as her partner dropped to the sand to greet Jared, the adorable little six-year-old who was trying to touch the sky with each push of the swing.

  "That’s high enough, Jared," Melinda said, afraid that his small body would slide out of the seat if he went much higher.

  A devilish look came over Ryan’s features as she looked up at the mothers and asked, "Mind if I give him a little excitement?"

  "Uhh…I guess not…umm…" Stacy hesitated.

  "She’s careful with others," Jamie assured them. "She’s only really wild when she’s on her own."

  "Okay," Melinda decided. "Go for it."

  "Hey, Jared," Ryan said in her most conspiratorial tone. "Wanna make your mamas’ eyes bug out?"

  The small boy nodded an enthusiastic yes, even though he looked a little hesitant to align his fortunes with this tall stranger. Ryan lifted him as she sat in the canvas sling, then placed him on her lap, facing her. "Okay, pal, hold on tight," she advised as she began to pump her powerful legs. In seconds they were going higher than Jamie had ever seen a human go on a swing. Three sets of eyes stared in shock as both Ryan and Jared threw their heads back and laughed hysterically. The little boy held on as
tight as his thin arms would allow, but Ryan had taken the extra precaution of wrapping her arms around the chains and then securely locking her hands around his back.

  "Mama! Mommy! Look!" he cried, reassuring himself that his parents were sharing in his joy.

  Both women smiled and waved at the wildly laughing boy, with Stacy saying to Jamie, "Would this be a good time to tell her he sometimes gets sick to his stomach on the swing?"

  "Nah," Jamie decided, unwilling to take one moment of joy from her partner. "She’s got on leather—I’ll just hose her down."

  "Did you have a good time, little girl?" the small blonde asked her tall companion when they departed the playground.

  "Yep." Ryan was beaming from ear to ear, a look of such satisfaction on her face that Jamie nearly cried. "You go lots faster if you swing with a buddy. You spur each other on." Wiggling eyebrows showed that Ryan thought this maxim could apply to other situations also, and Jamie was beginning to wish they were at home to explore some of them. But the remarkable sights that they continued to observe made her glad they had decided to stay.

  Not the least of her pleasure came from the wide variety of friends and ex-lovers that Ryan introduced her to. It was very reassuring to Jamie that very few of the exes seemed to show anything but fond feelings for her partner.

  After the AIDS Ride, she had been a little concerned that running into former lovers would be a constant strain, with woman after woman trying to give them a hard time or even trying to cause trouble in their relationship. But this group seemed to be on exactly the same wavelength as Ryan had been during her dating days. They seemed to be very open-minded about their sexual experiences. In fact, they seemed to be experimenting with their sexuality—trying to get and give pleasure without any major emotional commitment. Jamie knew that lifestyle would never work for her, but it had seemed to work for Ryan, and she was glad that these women were able to play the game in the same way, if that met their needs.